Welcome to TLR

Marriage from Hell

Butterflies

Major Ratslayer
As for me, I certainly know what is fueling my rat combats...Raised by a narcissist, married to a tunisian narcissist later on (happily divorced) I recognize abuse whenever I meet it!
Wondering how many of us had this kind of abuse before meeting a rat...
So true Myriam1 I think the same there are many women going through this and even some men to. I was raised by an abusive narcissist it stays with you for the rest of your life.
 

MH007

Administrator
Staff member
Thank you so much, my depression has got worse, just feels like I cannot forget what he done to me and I want to scream all the time. Going to a Crisis Cafe tomorrow x
I’m sorry to hear that but really pleased you are reaching out and going to the crisis cafe tomorrow - well done, that’s the hardest part done so now you can concentrate on recovering.

Hugs

MH x
 

Tigerpants

Major Ratslayer
Thank you so much, my depression has got worse, just feels like I cannot forget what he done to me and I want to scream all the time. Going to a Crisis Cafe tomorrow x
Good luck for tomorrow, you will no doubt meet someone there you relate to and can talk the bad things over with.He's not worth your sadness, please try and smile and enjoy tomorrow xx
 

WisedonatLast

Well-Known Member
Good luck for tomorrow, you will no doubt meet someone there you relate to and can talk the bad things over with.He's not worth your sadness, please try and smile and enjoy tomorrow xx
Thank you so much, I did not pluck up the courage to go but the doctor has now given me a line to call, you all have been wonderful, Im just trying to catch up on individual messages as I seem to keep missing them as Im quite new xx
 

Tigerpants

Major Ratslayer
Thank you so much, I did not pluck up the courage to go but the doctor has now given me a line to call, you all have been wonderful, Im just trying to catch up on individual messages as I seem to keep missing them as Im quite new xx
Things take time to happen. Good things, sad things, eye opening things, realisation things, looking in the mirror and thinking you want to make change things and this is what time is for.
Oh and P.S you have us lot in your ready time x
 

Starlight

Major Ratslayer
Thank you so much. Yes I cancelled his UK visa. My father never approved from the beginning which was a nightmare in itself but I havent told my parents about any of this, have no brothers or sisters, I dont feel I can and my 2 best friends disowned me when I married him so havent really got anyone who understands to talk to about it. I was thinking about going to a councillor !!
We are all here for u i don't have anyone any more tjey disowned me too because off my rat so much i lost and my friends are all here in tlr so much support from them im so in tears at yiur story I stopped my marraiage has his anger red flags were so bad it nearly caused me q break down ,these lovely ladies in here give u strength and help u do much we are from diffrent countries but we all support each other much love here .i hope u are doing OK keep your strength up much love snd s big hug to u xxxxx
 

MH007

Administrator
Staff member
We are all here for u i don't have anyone any more tjey disowned me too because off my rat so much i lost and my friends are all here in tlr so much support from them im so in tears at yiur story I stopped my marraiage has his anger red flags were so bad it nearly caused me q break down ,these lovely ladies in here give u strength and help u do much we are from diffrent countries but we all support each other much love here .i hope u are doing OK keep your strength up much love snd s big hug to u xxxxx
Lovely post <3
 

yougogirl75

Major Ratslayer
We are all here for u i don't have anyone any more tjey disowned me too because off my rat so much i lost and my friends are all here in tlr so much support from them im so in tears at yiur story I stopped my marraiage has his anger red flags were so bad it nearly caused me q break down ,these lovely ladies in here give u strength and help u do much we are from diffrent countries but we all support each other much love here .i hope u are doing OK keep your strength up much love snd s big hug to u xxxxx
You have been a great support for me @Starlight, especially making me laugh throughout my time here.
And all the other ladies have been supportive.
What I don't understand is how through all this we have been through, these rats can make out they are still the victim.
I intend on never giving my ex-rat any attention.
That bus left the station so long ago!
The rat said many times he put his heart into it LOL, where was the rat's heart when he was ripping me apart
I could never win could I?
If I stayed I would have continued to take the blame for nothing working out for the rat!
So when I went I was labelled cheater, a bad woman, obsessive, jealous, disloyal.
So who can win with a mentally ill Tunisian rat?
If he got to be 48 and still complaining, sorry but it ain't me to blame is it?
If I was suffering with my family members passing away, where was the rat's heart?
I didn't see any evidence of a good heart, I seen evidence of a deceitful rat though.
All I got was I am right you are wrong scenarios about things that happened long time ago, bullying, harassment, if it makes him feel better
that I am the bad one then so be it but I am not.
The same old record keeps playing about how I could never get the documents right and about how my father died unfortunately then I had an accident
but I PROMISED I WOULD COME TO GET MARRIED BLAH BLAH BLAH, its only the rat to blame for not knowing his laws, not my fault he got the money from
his family for a marriage not taking place in 2015.
If I send information of my arrival then he could have said to his family how this wedding would happen so how can I be blamed for something
I had no control of??
The most selfish rat, had he known he could have had a better life if he was treating me better he would have gotten it.
Just shaking my head, thinking what a waste it all was, to really believe in someone and and had the rat gotten more chances it still would be the same!!
If the rat was so great and continues as he calls himself a good man then why has he not been able to get anyone to be where he wants to be?
 
Last edited:

Starlight

Major Ratslayer
You have been a great support for me @Starlight, especially making me laugh throughout my time here.
And all the other ladies have been supportive.
What I don't understand is how through all this we have been through, these rats can make out they are still the victim.
I intend on never giving my ex-rat any attention.
That bus left the station so long ago!
The rat said many times he put his heart into it LOL, where was the rat's heart when he was ripping me apart
I could never win could I?
If I stayed I would have continued to take the blame for nothing working out for the rat!
So when I went I was labelled cheater, a bad woman, obsessive, jealous, disloyal.
So who can win with a mentally ill Tunisian rat?
If he got to be 48 and still complaining, sorry but it ain't me to blame is it?
If I was suffering with my family members passing away, where was the rat's heart?
I didn't see any evidence of a good heart, I seen evidence of a deceitful rat though.
All I got was I am right you are wrong scenarios about things that happened long time ago, bullying, harassment, if it makes him feel better
that I am the bad one then so be it but I am not.
The same old record keeps playing about how I could never get the documents right and about how my father died unfortunately then I had an accident
but I PROMISED I WOULD COME TO GET MARRIED BLAH BLAH BLAH, its only the rat to blame for not knowing his laws, not my fault he got the money from
his family for a marriage not taking place in 2015.
If I send information of my arrival then he could have said to his family how this wedding would happen so how can I be blamed for something
I had no control of??
The most selfish rat, had he known he could have had a better life if he was treating me better he would have gotten it.
Just shaking my head, thinking what a waste it all was, to really believe in someone and and had the rat gotten more chances it still would be the same!!
If the rat was so great and continues as he calls himself a good man then why has he not been able to get anyone to be where he wants to be?
I am the same blamed for his life before me
And blamed for walking away well he can't blame me for walking he caused it
Liar manipulater narssastic cheater
He lied so much he'd cover the lie with another lie
And i was too portrayed as a bad woman that I left him for another man
I didnt and im still single I left because off his abusive anger temper greedy selfish wanting wanting wanting !!!!
But never gave me anything back in return .
When I screamed at him first time ever where is my gifts as he promised me hed bought me a beautiful gold necklace i never got!!! I said why don't u ever pay why don't u ever send me
His reply was im your gift u got my body!!!!wtf !!!!
I shouted back where the hell is my refund !!!!!
I was near a break down
His demands his constant arguing everday talking over u telling u to shut the f up it barenak if his friends waz there
I thought I cant take no more
He was either arguing wanting demanding crying angry or in a vile temper
I had to leave after over 7 years it was enough I was tired so dam tired
Yougogirl75: u too been a inspiration to me sabrina butterflies and our mhoo7 all the lovely ladies in tlr i thank you all xxz
But somedays you laugh at the funny things in the relationship and laugh so much
But another day u remember the bad horrible times and break in tears !
I wish i had never met my rat !!!!!
 

Starlight

Major Ratslayer
I warn u all even the ones that come in and look and say mine is not a rat
Well they are everyone off them liars cheaters scammers thrives abusers!!!!!
When it says he's active in messages u message and he dosent even react be sure hes talking to another
When he's on call and angers out off the blue and cuts call that's because someone else is calling!!!!!!
If he calls u at certain time or waits till he gets home be sure hes got u all in a timer
If he dosent use your name that's because he dosent want to get names mixed up so it's habibi wife dear !!!
Just don't think your tunisian isn't a rat he is !!!!
They are all jealous off each other and u give be sure another wiman is too
Even haveing ur photos in his fb dosent deter him from other women he will lie and say we finished she cheated on me but i loved her or restrict the woman or your photos
Don't worry all his family relatives friends all know hez cheating and will laugh at you behind your back
The tunisians will nevet be faithful always greedy and because they are with you (unbee known to you ) only for money gifts visits visa they will never respect you NEVER RESPECT YOU EVER ONLY YOUR MONEY !!!!!!
 

Sabrina

Major Ratslayer
I am the same blamed for his life before me
And blamed for walking away well he can't blame me for walking he caused it
Liar manipulater narssastic cheater
He lied so much he'd cover the lie with another lie
And i was too portrayed as a bad woman that I left him for another man
I didnt and im still single I left because off his abusive anger temper greedy selfish wanting wanting wanting !!!!
But never gave me anything back in return .
When I screamed at him first time ever where is my gifts as he promised me hed bought me a beautiful gold necklace i never got!!! I said why don't u ever pay why don't u ever send me
His reply was im your gift u got my body!!!!wtf !!!!
I shouted back where the hell is my refund !!!!!
I was near a break down
His demands his constant arguing everday talking over u telling u to shut the f up it barenak if his friends waz there
I thought I cant take no more
He was either arguing wanting demanding crying angry or in a vile temper
I had to leave after over 7 years it was enough I was tired so dam tired
Yougogirl75: u too been a inspiration to me sabrina butterflies and our mhoo7 all the lovely ladies in tlr i thank you all xxz
But somedays you laugh at the funny things in the relationship and laugh so much
But another day u remember the bad horrible times and break in tears !
I wish i had never met my rat !!!!!
Of course he said you left for another man why else would someone leave such a gem? Ha I know they have a way of keeping you but omg how did you put up with such a vile rat for that long? I know it wasn’t easy as it got harder and harder I’m just glad you walked!!!
 

Sabrina

Major Ratslayer
I warn u all even the ones that come in and look and say mine is not a rat
Well they are everyone off them liars cheaters scammers thrives abusers!!!!!
When it says he's active in messages u message and he dosent even react be sure hes talking to another
When he's on call and angers out off the blue and cuts call that's because someone else is calling!!!!!!
If he calls u at certain time or waits till he gets home be sure hes got u all in a timer
If he dosent use your name that's because he dosent want to get names mixed up so it's habibi wife dear !!!
Just don't think your tunisian isn't a rat he is !!!!
They are all jealous off each other and u give be sure another wiman is too
Even haveing ur photos in his fb dosent deter him from other women he will lie and say we finished she cheated on me but i loved her or restrict the woman or your photos
Don't worry all his family relatives friends all know hez cheating and will laugh at you behind your back
The tunisians will nevet be faithful always greedy and because they are with you (unbee known to you ) only for money gifts visits visa they will never respect you NEVER RESPECT YOU EVER ONLY YOUR MONEY !!!!!!
True it’s all about money or whatever they can milk out of you! It amazes me how they can put on such an act for so long!
 

Butterflies

Major Ratslayer
@Starlight and @yougogirl75 you both had a terrible long time with your rats. It took a long time for you both to leave these basterds for what they where : rats and abusers. Hold your heads high ladies you both are strong ladies who went through alot so I wish you both a happy rat free future hoping you can give it a place in the past and heal from it completely. It will be in your mind sometimes but it will fade away when time passes :)
 

Starlight

Major Ratslayer
Of course he said you left for another man why else would someone leave such a gem? Ha I know they have a way of keeping you but omg how did you put up with such a vile rat for that long? I know it wasn’t easy as it got harder and harder I’m just glad you walked!!!
He wasn't that way at the begining he was loveing kind considerate but how a few years later he changed and began to show his true colours and red flags were appearing you can only ignore them for so long till u suddenly wake up and walk away to peace tranquility and a normal life xxx
Its blissful now and the truth is I wished I'd have walked away earlier xxxxz
 

Sabrina

Major Ratslayer
He wasn't that way at the begining he was loveing kind considerate but how a few years later he changed and began to show his true colours and red flags were appearing you can only ignore them for so long till u suddenly wake up and walk away to peace tranquility and a normal life xxx
Its blissful now and the truth is I wished I'd have walked away earlier xxxxz
I’m sure you do wished you had walked away sooner but if he wasn’t showing any weird signs it’s hard to. I feel sure he loved you however he changed probably getting ideas from his rat friends now he’s stuck in ratsville
 

Starlight

Major Ratslayer
I’m sure you do wished you had walked away sooner but if he wasn’t showing any weird signs it’s hard to. I feel sure he loved you however he changed probably getting ideas from his rat friends now he’s stuck in ratsville
No signs off anger untill the money requests came in i had never heard off mg wu before
then
But i didn't think there was signs but obviously there was but i didn't realise they were red flags till i came into tlr
No one thinks their love is doing anything wrong to them
If u feel sure he loved me why did he have to change
Love is the most amazing gift from God
But I wish maybe if I had walked sooner he would have fought true to have me back and would never have listened to his friends or demanded phone gifts money too many visits
I know how hard it is and i would have helped him but the anger that came with the requests for money gifts visits wore me down
If he truly loved me these requests would never have been requested in anger
Like he had the right to all this
Even when he worked he never paid for nothing or bought me nothing
But i worked hard so hard to pay for this !!!
I felt the love the protection the defending off me when in tunisia
But when I got home he didn't care who was there the way he spoke was so demeaning I felt worn out by the constant arguing I begged him pleaded to stop he always replied with u made me angry i was to blame for everything in his life
Thats no right or fair
My life had been less than petfect but I never blamed him
I just prayed to god to help me through the difficult times
I truly did love him in fact i was inlove with him so much
He broke me and my only saviour was my prayers xxxx
 

Sabrina

Major Ratslayer
No signs off anger untill the money requests came in i had never heard off mg wu before
then
But i didn't think there was signs but obviously there was but i didn't realise they were red flags till i came into tlr
No one thinks their love is doing anything wrong to them
If u feel sure he loved me why did he have to change
Love is the most amazing gift from God
But I wish maybe if I had walked sooner he would have fought true to have me back and would never have listened to his friends or demanded phone gifts money too many visits
I know how hard it is and i would have helped him but the anger that came with the requests for money gifts visits wore me down
If he truly loved me these requests would never have been requested in anger
Like he had the right to all this
Even when he worked he never paid for nothing or bought me nothing
But i worked hard so hard to pay for this !!!
I felt the love the protection the defending off me when in tunisia
But when I got home he didn't care who was there the way he spoke was so demeaning I felt worn out by the constant arguing I begged him pleaded to stop he always replied with u made me angry i was to blame for everything in his life
Thats no right or fair
My life had been less than petfect but I never blamed him
I just prayed to god to help me through the difficult times
I truly did love him in fact i was inlove with him so much
He broke me and my only saviour was my prayers xxxx
Yeah they make me sick thinking we owe them money or anything as far as that goes! I guess i would like to think the love is there at some point, I could very well be wrong!! They all suck
 

Starlight

Major Ratslayer
Yeah they make me sick thinking we owe them money or anything as far as that goes! I guess i would like to think the love is there at some point, I could very well be wrong!! They all suck
But that is what I cant get my head around is that they dare ask us for money as if we owe them
And we come all the way from our country pay for everything and the cheek off the rats expect multi gifts too are we that stupid !!!
Then they say we took advantage off them hahaha really!!!!
what do get from all this nothing one day we wake up and seriously think wtf are we doing here look at the rat and think i must have been on a serious break down to even consider the rat as a potential boyfriend
We were all off us delusional till we opened our eyes to the truth the tunisian rats are scum and will never change!!!!
 

yougogirl75

Major Ratslayer
But that is what I cant get my head around is that they dare ask us for money as if we owe them
And we come all the way from our country pay for everything and the cheek off the rats expect multi gifts too are we that stupid !!!
Then they say we took advantage off them hahaha really!!!!
what do get from all this nothing one day we wake up and seriously think wtf are we doing here look at the rat and think i must have been on a serious break down to even consider the rat as a potential boyfriend
We were all off us delusional till we opened our eyes to the truth the tunisian rats are scum and will never change!!!!
I know the rats are like vampires taking everything even your blood if they could.
What I don't get is how the ex-rat stated in the past that I put him through all this and that I knew I was unable to sponsor him?
No I went in with the best of intentions, if anyone lost out it was me in many ways.
So this is the guilt trip he left me with, but you know the rat second guessed me, downplayed and shortchanged me
and it was the rat that changed and flip flopped not me.
The rat stated as all the rats do that our love lasted long and it was worth any amount of money.
Sorry sometimes that rat relationship was hanging by a thread, and it lasted because of me.
Otherwise it would have ended like it always did before me!
How does treating someone bad time after time, cheating, the narcisisstic games, lying, betrayal and just doing and saying
dirty nasty things does not get a rat in my good books.
Backtracking after getting caught in their deception does not help their case.
I always try hard and never quit on people, even when never given an apology I deserve but you know
its not possible for me to be a doormat when another man would take me in an instant.
There are good men out there who would love to have the chance to have a good woman who never leaves or quits on them.
 
Top