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Opinions please

Annie-May

Rat Expert
I was told to take a look at this site by a friend. I dont have any doubts at all (I havent had any negative signs)but after reading on here it makes me worry, I'm a worrier at heart so reading negative stories makes me worry even more even when I have not yet experienced anything negative.
I have been talking to a guy online for the past 8 months, we have 3 years difference in age, him being older. He seems very traditional and respectful, he has never asked for money or pictures but sends me pictures of what he is doing, Also video calls me when he is out (providing he has internet)and shows me what he is doing. He has gave me his password to access his social media and has told me I can do so whenever I wish ( I have said I will not do this and have not done so)We have talked about me visiting but he has not put any pressure on me to visit until I am ready too.
I'm just curious on what people opinions are of this guy with the information I have provided. I feel he is genuine and i do trust him by what i know of him from talking but obviously you can never fully trust someone until you meet them so I'm curious as to what other people think by what I have said.
 

Sabrina

Major Ratslayer
I was told to take a look at this site by a friend. I dont have any doubts at all (I havent had any negative signs)but after reading on here it makes me worry, I'm a worrier at heart so reading negative stories makes me worry even more even when I have not yet experienced anything negative.
I have been talking to a guy online for the past 8 months, we have 3 years difference in age, him being older. He seems very traditional and respectful, he has never asked for money or pictures but sends me pictures of what he is doing, Also video calls me when he is out (providing he has internet)and shows me what he is doing. He has gave me his password to access his social media and has told me I can do so whenever I wish ( I have said I will not do this and have not done so)We have talked about me visiting but he has not put any pressure on me to visit until I am ready too.
I'm just curious on what people opinions are of this guy with the information I have provided. I feel he is genuine and i do trust him by what i know of him from talking but obviously you can never fully trust someone until you meet them so I'm curious as to what other people think by what I have said.
Well the fact that you met on line is the first him being so far away. He’s Tunisian? Does he work? The fact that he gave your his password is really nothing mine did too, fact is they can have many accounts different names different passwords . Is he going to pay for your expenses to come over? If he’s sincere he should. Welcome here and I hope we all can help ease your mind, I’m a worrier too unfortunately
 
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Annie-May

Rat Expert
Well the fact that you met on line is the first him being so far away. He’s Tunisian? Does he work? The fact that he gave your his password is really nice thing mine did too, fact is they can have many accounts different names different passwords . Is he going to pay for your expenses to come over? If he’s sincere he should. Welcome here and I hope we all can help ease your mind, I’m a worrier too unfortunately
Hi, yes he is tunisian. He is currently planting and looking after the familys olive trees. Apparently when younger he worked in a few hotels (one being a relatives, if I remember right) but he hated that work. He then had a shop but due to circumstances closed. I've tried to search about other possible accounts but have not found any (he assures me he just has one facebook account). As for visiting he has spoken about who would pay and said if I visit this year he wouldnt be able to pay but next year and any other years after he would be able to
 

Peacock

Major Ratslayer
I was told to take a look at this site by a friend. I dont have any doubts at all (I havent had any negative signs)but after reading on here it makes me worry, I'm a worrier at heart so reading negative stories makes me worry even more even when I have not yet experienced anything negative.
I have been talking to a guy online for the past 8 months, we have 3 years difference in age, him being older. He seems very traditional and respectful, he has never asked for money or pictures but sends me pictures of what he is doing, Also video calls me when he is out (providing he has internet)and shows me what he is doing. He has gave me his password to access his social media and has told me I can do so whenever I wish ( I have said I will not do this and have not done so)We have talked about me visiting but he has not put any pressure on me to visit until I am ready too.
I'm just curious on what people opinions are of this guy with the information I have provided. I feel he is genuine and i do trust him by what i know of him from talking but obviously you can never fully trust someone until you meet them so I'm curious as to what other people think by what I have said.

I was told to take a look at this site by a friend. I dont have any doubts at all (I havent had any negative signs)but after reading on here it makes me worry, I'm a worrier at heart so reading negative stories makes me worry even more even when I have not yet experienced anything negative.
I have been talking to a guy online for the past 8 months, we have 3 years difference in age, him being older. He seems very traditional and respectful, he has never asked for money or pictures but sends me pictures of what he is doing, Also video calls me when he is out (providing he has internet)and shows me what he is doing. He has gave me his password to access his social media and has told me I can do so whenever I wish ( I have said I will not do this and have not done so)We have talked about me visiting but he has not put any pressure on me to visit until I am ready too.
I'm just curious on what people opinions are of this guy with the information I have provided. I feel he is genuine and i do trust him by what i know of him from talking but obviously you can never fully trust someone until you meet them so I'm curious as to what other people think by what I have said.
Hi and welcome

Withoutmore details I can't really offer much opinion-wise.

I have never understood why Tunisians feel the need to constantly send photos/videos as proof of what they are doing. It's not normal behaviour of an innocent man.

Giving you his password isn't what I regard as normal behaviour of an innocent man either. If someone has nothing to hide why feel the need to prove it? Usually they give the password to one account but have other accounts on the go.

Maybe he is genuine, but most aren't. Have a good read on this site and then you will have more idea about what to look out for. Fishing for women online is not a good sign though. The goal is usually for a visa or money.
 

Sabrina

Major Ratslayer
Hi and welcome

Withoutmore details I can't really offer much opinion-wise.

I have never understood why Tunisians feel the need to constantly send photos/videos as proof of what they are doing. It's not normal behaviour of an innocent man.

Giving you his password isn't what I regard as normal behaviour of an innocent man either. If someone has nothing to hide why feel the need to prove it? Usually they give the password to one account but have other accounts on the go.

Maybe he is genuine, but most aren't. Have a good read on this site and then you will have more idea about what to look out for. Fishing for women online is not a good sign though. The goal is usually for a visa or money.
so true why is he trying to prove himself????
 

Nameless

Well-Known Member
I was told to take a look at this site by a friend. I dont have any doubts at all (I havent had any negative signs)but after reading on here it makes me worry, I'm a worrier at heart so reading negative stories makes me worry even more even when I have not yet experienced anything negative.
I have been talking to a guy online for the past 8 months, we have 3 years difference in age, him being older. He seems very traditional and respectful, he has never asked for money or pictures but sends me pictures of what he is doing, Also video calls me when he is out (providing he has internet)and shows me what he is doing. He has gave me his password to access his social media and has told me I can do so whenever I wish ( I have said I will not do this and have not done so)We have talked about me visiting but he has not put any pressure on me to visit until I am ready too.
I'm just curious on what people opinions are of this guy with the information I have provided. I feel he is genuine and i do trust him by what i know of him from talking but obviously you can never fully trust someone until you meet them so I'm curious as to what other people think by what I have said.
Hi Annie-May, welcome x
In my opinion, him giving you his passwords to his socials is not normal. It looks like he’s trying to already prove to you that he can be trusted. Unfortunately could it be part of his act? I would also be concerned at the fact you met online, the outcome for your relationship is to get married & for him to come & live with you in your country & unfortunately he already knows this. I know it’s not what you want to hear and that you feel he is genuine. We have all been in your situation or similar ones, but my advice to you would be very cautious regardless if he doesn’t do the obvious, like asking for money etc. Some really do know how to make you feel they are different from the others & 9/10 in reality they are not & we live & learn the hard way. Everyone here will be able to support you & give you their advice x
 

Butterflies

Major Ratslayer
I was told to take a look at this site by a friend. I dont have any doubts at all (I havent had any negative signs)but after reading on here it makes me worry, I'm a worrier at heart so reading negative stories makes me worry even more even when I have not yet experienced anything negative.
I have been talking to a guy online for the past 8 months, we have 3 years difference in age, him being older. He seems very traditional and respectful, he has never asked for money or pictures but sends me pictures of what he is doing, Also video calls me when he is out (providing he has internet)and shows me what he is doing. He has gave me his password to access his social media and has told me I can do so whenever I wish ( I have said I will not do this and have not done so)We have talked about me visiting but he has not put any pressure on me to visit until I am ready too.
I'm just curious on what people opinions are of this guy with the information I have provided. I feel he is genuine and i do trust him by what i know of him from talking but obviously you can never fully trust someone until you meet them so I'm curious as to what other people think by what I have said.
Hi @AnnieMay welcome here and as the ladies already said meeting a tunisian man online is not really a good sign. And the providing of his password its common with rats so you feel safe as he let's you see everything on his social media as most of these men have multiple social media and all with different names so its impossible for you to find them or you are blocked from these accounts. I would be quick on his social media but I am a nosy woman. When you spoke to him about visiting him in the near future how will that happen? In a hotel, at his family house, will you stay together in an apartment? Who knows if he is genuine but most genuine tunisian men don't fish on the internet for a future wife
 

Amira

Major Ratslayer
I was told to take a look at this site by a friend. I dont have any doubts at all (I havent had any negative signs)but after reading on here it makes me worry, I'm a worrier at heart so reading negative stories makes me worry even more even when I have not yet experienced anything negative.
I have been talking to a guy online for the past 8 months, we have 3 years difference in age, him being older. He seems very traditional and respectful, he has never asked for money or pictures but sends me pictures of what he is doing, Also video calls me when he is out (providing he has internet)and shows me what he is doing. He has gave me his password to access his social media and has told me I can do so whenever I wish ( I have said I will not do this and have not done so)We have talked about me visiting but he has not put any pressure on me to visit until I am ready too.
I'm just curious on what people opinions are of this guy with the information I have provided. I feel he is genuine and i do trust him by what i know of him from talking but obviously you can never fully trust someone until you meet them so I'm curious as to what other people think by what I have said.
You've never been to Tunisia before? So if you have not met him face to face then it is difficult to tell if he is a good guy .If you travel to Tunisia book a hotel room so you are in safe areas. Signals to look for are if he asks for money has facebook pages have had lots of contact with different women is aggressive. Then you should stay far away from him. Take care of yourself
 

Annie-May

Rat Expert
Hi Annie-May, welcome x
In my opinion, him giving you his passwords to his socials is not normal. It looks like he’s trying to already prove to you that he can be trusted. Unfortunately could it be part of his act? I would also be concerned at the fact you met online, the outcome for your relationship is to get married & for him to come & live with you in your country & unfortunately he already knows this. I know it’s not what you want to hear and that you feel he is genuine. We have all been in your situation or similar ones, but my advice to you would be very cautious regardless if he doesn’t do the obvious, like asking for money etc. Some really do know how to make you feel they are different from the others & 9/10 in reality they are not & we live & learn the hard way. Everyone here will be able to support you & give you their advice x
Thank you for your opinion. To be fair it's me that has initiated alot of the contact each day. I feel like he knows I am a bit wary due to meeting online he sort of said this the other day hence he told me to repeat what he said and when I did he said that is my password. I have feelings for him but I havent actually said anything to make him know this but he said he can tell I like him. He said the other day that the fact i dont say nice words that often and use babe darling etc is why he likes me, because most people use those words loosely
 

Myriam1

Major Ratslayer
Hello Annie-May and welcome here.
It is indeed not a good sign that your "friend" fished you on the internet, through which site/channel did he meet you? No well intentioned tunisian man would do that, only the ones that aim to get out of the country do so, they all are looking for a westeren wife to get the necessary papers, love is not involved... Of course they pretend to be in love, but they actually only love the papers. Sorry to be blunt.
And no, meeting him in person will not take your doubts away...maybe in the beginning you won't see it coming, he'll be all charming and sweet BUT once you will be hooked the reality will be totally different! In fact meeting him in person is not a good idea. Just tell him that you don't have the money to come and visit him and see what happens. And please, don't disclose any of your actual life and situation to this man, he will use it against you.
Also, what's the use of giving you his password, it's only to give you a fake idea of his honesty...
So sorry to tell you all this, but believe us, we know their ways so well!!!!
 

Annie-May

Rat Expert
Hi @AnnieMay welcome here and as the ladies already said meeting a tunisian man online is not really a good sign. And the providing of his password its common with rats so you feel safe as he let's you see everything on his social media as most of these men have multiple social media and all with different names so its impossible for you to find them or you are blocked from these accounts. I would be quick on his social media but I am a nosy woman. When you spoke to him about visiting him in the near future how will that happen? In a hotel, at his family house, will you stay together in an apartment? Who knows if he is genuine but most genuine tunisian men don't fish on the internet for a future wife
Thank you for your reply, dont get me wrong I have been tempted to access his social media to put my mind at ease but i feel bad in doing that. Should i look or not, what would you do?. He recommended staying in a hotel. As for searching for a future wife on the internet , I wouldnt say it is his full intentions as he did ask if I'd rather just be friends and that if I wanted to be he would be proud to have me as a friend. He says he finds it hard at his age now to meet girls
 

Amira

Major Ratslayer
I was told to take a look at this site by a friend. I dont have any doubts at all (I havent had any negative signs)but after reading on here it makes me worry, I'm a worrier at heart so reading negative stories makes me worry even more even when I have not yet experienced anything negative.
I have been talking to a guy online for the past 8 months, we have 3 years difference in age, him being older. He seems very traditional and respectful, he has never asked for money or pictures but sends me pictures of what he is doing, Also video calls me when he is out (providing he has internet)and shows me what he is doing. He has gave me his password to access his social media and has told me I can do so whenever I wish ( I have said I will not do this and have not done so)We have talked about me visiting but he has not put any pressure on me to visit until I am ready too.
I'm just curious on what people opinions are of this guy with the information I have provided. I feel he is genuine and i do trust him by what i know of him from talking but obviously you can never fully trust someone until you meet them so I'm curious as to what other people think by what I have said.
He's given you his password, it's weird. You have never met him in real life? You only know each other via the internet
 

Amira

Major Ratslayer
Thank you for your reply, dont get me wrong I have been tempted to access his social media to put my mind at ease but i feel bad in doing that. Should i look or not, what would you do?. He recommended staying in a hotel. As for searching for a future wife on the internet , I wouldnt say it is his full intentions as he did ask if I'd rather just be friends and that if I wanted to be he would be proud to have me as a friend. He says he finds it hard at his age now to meet girls
Do you have any experience with Tunsia? Do you know the culture? That it is difficult for him to meet girls is probably true because he must have money to get involved with a Tunisian girl.
 

Croydon girl

Major Ratslayer
Thank you for your reply, dont get me wrong I have been tempted to access his social media to put my mind at ease but i feel bad in doing that. Should i look or not, what would you do?. He recommended staying in a hotel. As for searching for a future wife on the internet , I wouldnt say it is his full intentions as he did ask if I'd rather just be friends and that if I wanted to be he would be proud to have me as a friend. He says he finds it hard at his age now to meet girls
How old is he then?
 

Annie-May

Rat Expert
Do you have any experience with Tunsia? Do you know the culture? That it is difficult for him to meet girls is probably true because he must have money to get involved with a Tunisian girl.
I've never been but have always wanted to.I have a half tunisian friend so I have heard alot about tunisian and the culture and have read alot also. He has been involved with Tunisian girls in the past but nothing has worked out. To be fair I think from what he tell me, I guess he has only just started to grow up and think about his life a bit more, but then so have I
 

Annie-May

Rat Expert
He's given you his password, it's weird. You have never met him in real life? You only know each other via the internet
I think he knows I'm a bit wary, and he said he understands that as we have not met and only know each other on social media, maybe that's why he gave his password. He said he can only talk to one girl at a time and has criticised people he knows that talks to multiple people at once.he has never asked for my password, he said he trusts me and wants me to trust him. By the way he talks I think he used to check up on his ex's social media as he said he finds it hard to trust people
 

confuseddotcom

Major Ratslayer
First off where did you meet him? And he may or may not be a decent fella but let’s say that he is, do you know much about Tunisian culture? And would you be ready to adapt to it? What are your own hopes for the relationship... Marriage? Relocation? It’s easy to get caught up in the fantasy and by the time we realise we’re not compatible it’s hard to let go cause we’re in too deep...
 

tutusandfrogs

Major Ratslayer
Him offering his password is a red flag for me. I don't have any other insight but most Tunisians seem to be waiting to marry closer to 30. My husband's sister is 23 and she's been engaged for 3 years now and they don't even know yet when they'll marry. Mind you, they don't date or meet eachother. They just talk on WhatsApp.
 

Sabrina

Major Ratslayer
Thank you for your reply, dont get me wrong I have been tempted to access his social media to put my mind at ease but i feel bad in doing that. Should i look or not, what would you do?. He recommended staying in a hotel. As for searching for a future wife on the internet , I wouldnt say it is his full intentions as he did ask if I'd rather just be friends and that if I wanted to be he would be proud to have me as a friend. He says he finds it hard at his age now to meet girls
You will
I think he knows I'm a bit wary, and he said he understands that as we have not met and only know each other on social media, maybe that's why he gave his password. He said he can only talk to one girl at a time and has criticised people he knows that talks to multiple people at once.he has never asked for my password, he said he trusts me and wants me to trust him. By the way he talks I think he used to check up on his ex's social media as he said he finds it hard to trust people
you will not find anything in the Acct he gave you the password to except for what he wants you to see. So if you just want to be friends why go over? Where will he stay? Who initiated the relationship I’m a little confused
 
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Annie-May

Rat Expert
Him offering his password is a red flag for me. I don't have any other insight but most Tunisians seem to be waiting to marry closer to 30. My husband's sister is 23 and she's been engaged for 3 years now and they don't even know yet when they'll marry. Mind you, they don't date or meet eachother. giving his password to me

First off where did you meet him? And he may or may not be a decent fella but let’s say that he is, do you know much about Tunisian culture? And would you be ready to adapt to it? What are your own hopes for the relationship... Marriage? Relocation? It’s easy to get caught up in the fantasy and by the time we realise we’re not compatible it’s hard to let go cause we’re in too deep...
I have an idea about the culture from reading, a friend and from him. We have talked about the culture difference alot, he has laughed at things I've mentioned about me and told me that I'm more Muslim than him and most people in tunisia, this made me laugh because I've been told by people before that how I think and by my lifestyle choices I would make a good muslim. Marriage isn't something I would rush into but it is something I am searching for one day. We have talked about what we want from our futures wether it is with each other or not and we seem to want the same thing. And that is with him telling me first, so I know he isnt just saying that because he knows that's what I'm looking for in life
 

Annie-May

Rat Expert
Him offering his password is a red flag for me. I don't have any other insight but most Tunisians seem to be waiting to marry closer to 30. My husband's sister is 23 and she's been engaged for 3 years now and they don't even know yet when they'll marry. Mind you, they don't date or meet eachother. They just talk on WhatsApp.
Why does giving his password signify a red flag, a few have said this and I'm curious as to why. I know with an ex he was talking to her for 10 months through phone calls before meeting her in her city
 

Sabrina

Major Ratslayer
Thank you for your opinion. To be fair it's me that has initiated alot of the contact each day. I feel like he knows I am a bit wary due to meeting online he sort of said this the other day hence he told me to repeat what he said and when I did he said that is my password. I have feelings for him but I havent actually said anything to make him know this but he said he can tell I like him. He said the other day that the fact i dont say nice words that often and use babe darling etc is why he likes me, because most people use those words loosely
The fact that he told you he knows you like him.....of course we all did even after their true colors were shown be careful not to fall for his bad t he sounds already experienced in this field in my eyes
 

Annie-May

Rat Expert
So sounds like you know what you want already don’t get offended at what we say we are going from our experience..
Right now what I want is to see where this leads, I have feelings and I cant change them instantly. Something good could happen or something bad could happen but that's like with any relationship I could have here where I live. I'm not rushing into anything and I'm still not rushing to meet. Maybe after talking a bit longer I might feel differently. I will not be offended by what is said, how can I when I'm asking for opinions. I'm taking on board what is being said but also I need to listen to how i am feeling too
 
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