Hi Susie, I take it you mean if you're unsure whether the guy is a rat or not? I guess if you have a person in mind and want to find out if anyone else 'knows' him, then that's your call

. The only thing to bear in mind is that there may be difficult repercussions - you must weigh up any information gleaned from other persons against your own evaluation of the guy and of your relationship. There are so many variables - not least that of time (i.e. someone may have been rat-like in the past, but may have genuine feelings for someone in the present) Some people don't advise with good intentions (though, it has to be said, most regular members here have no axes to grind!), so information can be loaded with another person's baggage! That said, if a person feels the need to 'test' their partner, then that usually indicates that they have doubts of their own already!
If you want to ask the question, then I personally don't see the harm as long as you're clear about what to do with any information that may or may not come your way

xxx